Everything Changes
by Love Indused Insomnia
Summary: Love changes.Even when you think you've found your perfect match,there's always something there that keeps you apart from that person, even if you don't acknowledge it.All inkow is that,right now, there is nothing i want more than Jasper.


_**Everything Changes**_

_**A Twilight Fan Fiction**_

_**By Love Induced Insomnia**_

_Love changes. Even when you think you've found your perfect match, there's always something there that keeps you apart from that person, even if you don't acknowledge it. A stolen moment can have your head spinning for hours until you realize that he isn't really the one for you. A single touch can have you waiting for more until that empty craving is filled. I don't know how long ive felt like this for him, or even where these words came from, but I know that right now there is nothing I want more that Jasper_.

**Present day**

I knew at that moment, watching them simply _be_ together without the need to speak or even touch, that I would never accomplish what they had. Worse even, I would never even get to tell Edward of how much I loved him- as a mentor, as a brother, as a protector. I loved him for everything he was to me. He was my shoulder to cry on, the missing link in my happiness. But I was never _in_ love with him. No. My heart belonged to Jasper now, as it always should have- even if we refused to acknowledge it. I wanted to break down crying there, to beg Edward to understand that I couldn't resist the need anymore. His kisses left me guilty and unfilled; I knew from the moment I had set my eyes on Jasper that only those wonderful lips could ever satiate my thirst. I would have laughed at the irony if it didn't cause me so much pain. Along with my feelings for Jasper, there was only two things I was absolutely sure of: first, all eyes were on me as I made my way my way through the crowd of Vampires I considered my family, and secondly, once I stepped out that door, nobody was bringing me back.

**24 hours earlier**

Alice: the object of my jealousy.

Jasper: the object of my desire.

Together, they were a deadly force that made me want to just put an end to my life. One of the many reasons I was glad Edward couldn't read my mind was that he would have killed Jasper if he found out the truth. Things were easy with Edward, natural, effortless. Worry-free. Things with Jasper, on the other hand, couldn't have been more complicated. How many times had I let my emotions slip around him, revealed how much I really wanted his love? Too many times, apparently, because right now he was questioning me about that exactly, in his room that was laced with his intoxicating smell. "What's that all about, Bells?" It was extremely hard to concentrate because of his proximity. Hell, it was hard to concentrate when I was in the same god damned room as him. "I d-don't know what youre talking about…. Jasper" I was overwhelmed with joy at the sound of his name, at the feel of it rolling off my tongue. Not good. He eyed me suspiciously and tilted his head to the side, exposing his scarred neck. I didn't understand why Alice asked him to cover them- they were just scars; nothing to it. Noticing my gaze, he reached up to cover them with his hand. "Sorry."

Jasper must have been the oddest creature I had ever met. "_Im_ sorry- its not polite to stare."

He let out a throaty chuckle and I was enthralled by the way his Adams apple bobbed. "_That's_ what I mean, Bella. What's up with _that?" _The embarrassment came before the rejection did, but when it did, it hit me like a ton of bricks to the small of my back. "N-nothing. Really. I just…I have t-to go.." on my way out, I brushed past him ever so slightly, reveling in the sensation that left me tingling all over.

"Im not letting you go until you answer." Cool breathe fanned across my face, but I still felt like I was on fire. His hands were on either side of my head and his lips were just inches away from mine- the slightest movement from either of us and they'd brush against each other. "I cant…._ you_ cant." I don't know if I was answering his question or the craving to lean in "I _need _to know what's going on. The suspense is killing me Bells." He leaned his head towards my neck and for a moment I thought he was going to bite me; but he just tapped his head against the wall. "It's killing me even more Jasper." I shifted slightly and our bodies brushed in a feather-like caress. I wasn't sure if I'd done it purposely or not, but I liked it. "_That! _What the _hell_ is that Bella!" how could he not understand by now? How could he _ever_ understand? "Ill show you if you make me a promise." He spoke his reply into the wall. "Anything for you." So with shaky hands, I tapped his shoulder and closed my eyes. "You have to forget about this once ive done it." ignoring his confused grunt I imagined us together and gave free reign to my emotions- there was no way he wouldn't understand my feelings now. What _I _didn't understand, though, was what happened next: I felt his smooth hand on my cheek and then I felt his lips brush against my throat. When I opened my eyes I was met with his golden orbs and my breathing hitched considerably- his face was much closer than it had been before. "This is bad, Bella. Very bad." Still, he slowly closed the gap between our waiting lips and I whimpered when he pulled back.I knew that I would be miserable if I continued with Edward.

" I have an announcement!" Alice's voice rang out like wind chimes, and I envied the way Jaspers eyes lit up when she flashed him one of her dazzling smiles. "Hmph…sure, sure." I grunted out, earning a glare from Rosalie and a warning jab in the ribs by Emmett- I still wasn't sure how they had found out about me and Jasper's stolen moment. Either way, I felt like throwing up in front of everybody when Alice skipped merrily over to Jasper and looped her small arm around his. My stomache churned in an uneasy way and I set down my drink; id thank myself later. "We're getting married again." At that moment, three things happened at the same time: first, my heart gave a little stutter before beating erratically; second, the color drained from Jaspers face as he glanced at me; and third, Alice stared at me dead in the eye with a smirk. How many Cullens knew about my secret already?

I knew at that moment, watching them simply _be_ together without the need to speak or even touch, that I would never accomplish what they had. Worse even, I would never even get to tell Edward of how much I loved him- as a mentor, as a brother, as a protector. I loved him for everything he was to me. He was my shoulder to cry on, the missing link in my happiness. But I was never _in_ love with him. No. My heart belonged to Jasper now, as it always should have- even if we refused to acknowledge it. I wanted to break down crying there, to beg Edward to understand that I couldn't resist the need anymore. His kisses left me guilty and unfilled; I knew from the moment I had set my eyes on Jasper that only those wonderful lips could ever satiate my thirst. I would have laughed at the irony if it didn't cause me so much pain. Along with my feelings for Jasper, there was only two things I was absolutely sure of: first, all eyes were on me as I made my way my way through the crowd of Vampires I considered my family, and second, once I stepped out that door, nobody was bringing me back.


End file.
